Mind vs Heart

What's with this reverse psychology ? Why do we keep telling that we don't want something, when we really really want that so bad. And why do we even said we need something that we can't even understand. I don't understand......

I told people to be mature, though I loved being a kid.

I expect things to go the right way, though I don't even try.

I convinced people to study well, though I buy new game every month.

I told myself that I don't really need something, though I'd give my everything to have that.

I told people to stop worrying about me, though I'm not really sure how well I'm doing.

I gave people some really good advice, though I'm stuck...with my own life.

I cheered up when people invited me to go with them, though I don't like people.

I said that I want to make many friends, though I just want to be alone.

I thought to myself that I needed love, though I don't know what love really is...

It's not the loneliness that's gonna eat me alive, it's when I think it is.